Reflection
by gunner brat
Summary: My view on what could be if the antidote isn't found and Shinichi has a second chance at childhood.


Disclaimer:I do not own Case Closed/Detective Conan or Meitantei Conan; nor am I making money off of this.

Note:I only watched some of the subbed anime and this is my fanfic of this category and this is un-betaed.

Reflecting back on his years as Shinichi Kudo, Conan Edogawa was surprised he didn't realize the truth sooner, about who he was. In his first year, he had lived several million moments, over one hundred thousand hours, tens of thousands of days, in comparison to the several smaller moments that amounted to the handful that he lived as Conan but he knew he could blame it on firm denial of a truth that he could not bear at the time. Ran Mouri, his childhood friend and girlfriend along with being the one he pictured marrying, had become something forbidden and all the more desirable once it became horrifyingly wrong and completely implausible to be with her as they were before, had become Ran-neechan, his older sister, a mother substitute since she took care of him instead of the other way around. Sonoko, Ran's best friend, and a constant in Shinichi's life became another older sister figure, just more annoying, and almost unfair. They had butted heads, as children sometimes as they fought for a spot in Ran's life as her best friend, until they both became one, and hostilities wavered until for Ran's sake they tolerated each other becoming friends.

Ran had changed over the years in unexpected ways due to Shinichi's disappearance. He couldn't ask her to wait ten years for him and she was growing up without him. They were each others first's in many ways but they never took the final step in their relationship after a year in college. Conan was glad that they didn't but the small part that remembered her as best friend/girlfriend felt more than saw what could have been. He would have become a great detective, and they would marry. He would have had kids, a wife, a job, and never known how deep the evil of some people were personally. He changed and his relationships with his inner circle did too. He grew in trying to build himself up again. Ran waited as long as she could and in a simple phone message where her voice broke and in a broken stillness she said she couldn't wait any longer with an I'm sorry and she hung up. Conan watched her as she held his hand tight and wondered how he kept it together while he heard her say her goodbye. He couldn't bring himself to delete the message for months. For being Ran's "husband" as Sonoko called him, he broke her heart, and would support her not as Shinichi but Conan.

Conan never stopped being a detective but he got into soccer deep once she called it off. He already knew but the antidote if there was one would come too late. He had lost everything as Shinichi- and despite having to go through puberty twice he couldn't bring himself to hate Ai, nor his situation. It had been devastating realizing that he saw Ran Mouri as an older sister, that he was closer to elementary school students then his own peers as Shinichi. He didn't care as much as Shinichi but as Conan he depended on them as a sort of extended family until they all would graduate. His ability in soccer and the fact that he along with Genta,Ayumi,Ai, and Mitsuhiko helping out as the detective boys did got respect and admiration from his peers and he related to them far better the second time around even if he didn't understand it the first time.

His relationtionship with Haibara improved as the one with Ran declined. He couldn't bring himself to hate her after all they went through. He tried but she was broken by her former masters and was forced to start all over again with nothing. Her sister was the only one who was worth it and she was dead before she even met Conan. The evil eyed yawny girl never had a chance at a normal life, or a clean slate until becoming Ai. Even then she couldn't forget but she thawed out eventually finding herself suddenly truly neck deep in a Japanese Elementary School experience. She liked Yaiba man as much as Conan but tolerated it and sometimes being infected by the kids enthusiasm over some things. She only stopped looking for an antidote after they became middle school students. Conan eventually noticed Ai's feelings and they had tentative dates together until they were inseparable.

The only other female in the detective boys blossomed into a beautiful flower. Her crush on Conan faded and she was on an off again relationship with Genta throughout their elementary to highschool years. It caused a crack then became an impassable rift after they became official. Everyone around them saw it coming. Time would determine if they stayed together but they were a good match. Genta towered over just about every student in the class and Ayumi shifted from cute to gorgeous once puberty hit. It was usually her, Genta, and Mitsuhiko or Ayumi, Genta, Mitsuhiko, and Conan and Ai as Ai would convince Conan to come if she had to do help out. Neither of them minded on occasion helping out with the detective boys cases. Genta and Mitsuhiko under Conan's tutelage were very good for elementary, then middle, and finally High school students. Mitsuhiko and Genta joined the soccer team in their second year of middle school and while not as good as Conan were still prominent on the soccer field. Conan was the star of the team though,but it was Ayumi who patched him up and cheered her boys on while Ai read her magazines during their matches.

Conan enjoyed middle school and high school despite the boredom of already studying most of the material. The cases that he took an unofficial role was a balm to his soul. He was growing up and so he couldn't exactly snoop around like before he enjoyed having a voice. The six months off of school did more harm than good academically. He and Ai were recruited to help take down the black organization and they did so until Conan left after having one fall too many and Ai followed him reluctantly. Neither wanted to give up on it but for the time being the bad guys were winning and the risk of being recognized and actually being attacked got greater as they got older. They fell back into civilian life only to end up crashing hard and with only each other to confide in on a intimate level him and Ai became best friends then more. It wasn't a rapid shift but like him and Ran it was their understanding and it was just one of many thousands of moments that lead to them finally getting together. He could remember calling Ran about it and the odd silence.

Mitsuhiko was the dark horse of the detective boys. He took over as leader when Conan and Ai were unavailable leading the three on many different adventures and he even became middle school class president. He would probably never be as good as Conan but he aspired to do computer forensics and he worked hard at it. Conan could see him becoming a police man just for a mostly free ride to get to his job. The boy had grown up- they all did- and Conan couldn't be any prouder or bitter at it. He admired Mitsuhiko actually. The boy didn't have the raw talent that Conan had but he had the drive and potential to be a great detective. It was odd growing up with them. They could go out for a day or two without adult supervision and didn't go on nearly half as many treasure hunts as before.

Conan would always value his experience with Ran as Shinichi but over the years they became somewhat bittersweet. He loved her and it broke his hear even if he knew it was coming. He treasured the fleeting memories and stolen moments with Ran but as he lay with Ai Kudo nee Haibara beside him, he could only be happy with the way things turned out, and grateful for the second chance. Every now and then he wondered what would happen if he wasn't de-aged, or if they stayed with the black organization investigation permanently but it was all in the past. He was with Ai when they took down the boss and seeing the face of the man who hurt his wife, he wanted to kill him more than anything else, but it was Ai who was beside him. With her hand in his he stood alert and watching the last of them go down he could only feel regret. The paths not taken, the choices made, and the possibilities lost in time, forever, and unable to change. The melancholy mood lasted until they reached Japan and saw the smiling faces of their children with their grandparents.


End file.
